Quantcast
Channel: RVA Magazine Articles
Viewing all articles
Browse latest Browse all 2642

Doctor Astronaut’s Star Slam

$
0
0

The full moon in Virgo has had people either wanting to be fixed or wanting to fix somebody or something, like right now. We’re all either sucking on mommy’s breast or smothering the senses out of others with our own nurturing nips. Neptune in Pisces has allowed you this comfort for now. But find your savior elsewhere soon, or you’ll discover what “dark mother syndrome” is all about. You can’t evade reality for long, but for now you can soften the blow, or numb the pain.

Mercury retrograde isn’t going to help. In the next couple of weeks, jalopies will finally break down, communication will be jumbly and confusing, and technology will be glitchy and delayed. Any seeds planted now will probably not grow into fruition until May.

On second thought, go ahead and keep breastfeeding. Or you could always resort to alcohol.

Aries/Aries Rising

You’re so good at your job, aren’t you? You buck around ramming yourself into opportunity at will, with all the fiery passion you can muster, always assuming something or somebody will keep a match lit for you. Hopefully you took some time to sit down this week and take stock. Your little personal pilot light still burns, but if you move too quickly and pass it by, you’ll run out of fuel. Any projects you begin right now will most definitely see delays. But you will begin them anyway, Aries, won’t you?

Taurus/Taurus Rising

You’re pretty sure we all secretly admire you, which is exactly what you want. Earthy, bullheaded Taureans refuse to deny themselves the pleasures of the good life. You’ve been doing what it takes to make it happen. A word to the wise: acknowledge that your stubborn and steady trudging towards the good life has somehow led you in a direction far from the calm and ease that you really need. Not to mention sex.

Gemini/Gemini Rising

Silly Gemini. Always flitting about absorbing and expelling information like a little machine, split between lasting connections and maintaining countless surface level connections. The Twins can be like compressed hot air when you can’t contain yourself. Spread thin, and without visible substance. But we all know that you can ease tension and breathe new life into others if you can somehow focus. Your family is in focus. Now is not the time to flake out. You’ll be luckier than the rest of us this Mercury retro cycle, so use your communication skills to your advantage in work.

Cancer/Cancer Rising

When you’re done hiding in your cave and licking your wounds, you may want to peek out into the real world, moody Cancerian. Your feelers are extra tingly during these transits so keep that impenetrable shell on for protection. But it’s likely that you’ll start noticing that many of the problems you are experiencing actually have little or nothing to do with you. Put down the comfort food and lay off the sauce now, little crab. Your nurturing abilities look like emotional masturbation if you’re always using them on yourself.

Leo/Leo Rising

Everybody knows you’re wonderful, don’t they, fire cat? Sure, you were labeled a braggart or a spendthrift once, but you were probably just drunk, and somebody caught you at a weak moment. Early this month, you got away with some frivolity concerning your finances perhaps, or maybe your relationships. Spend the rest of the month cleaning up your only mildly bruised image. Toss your mane, by all means, but clean off your paws. To be dignified, you’ll need to be more conservative in the coming weeks.

Virgo/Virgo Rising

If you could maneuver everybody else around you just so, your life will fit into a very neat little picture--centered around your perfect plan, of course. Sweet Virgo, everybody and everything has its place. The problem is that you are not the center of the universe. Its place, or their place, may or may not be according to your carefully laid plans. You’ve probably been cashing in on some of the rewards of your persistence and hard work lately. Don’t be so aggressive, or you might piss somebody off. On the bright side, your sex life is going to heat up.

Libra/Libra Rising

I bet you’ve lost your balance. You’re a social butterfly. But you’re not. You’re a hard worker. But you haven’t been. Whatever your demons, dear Libra, it seems as though the universe is opposing you right now. Frankly, it is. So just this once, use the mantra: “My life is my own doing.” Right now, you are in the spotlight in your own world. And you probably need to be. You’re looking into your subconscious, whether you like it or not, and you’re doing some rearranging. The scales are tipped. You are experiencing way too much of… something, and way too little of... something else. So what are YOU going to do about it?

Scorpio/Scorpio Rising

Those tried and true vices are extra tempting this month, sexy Scorpions. But recently, your transformative powers have got you thinking about some changes in the not-so-flattering trends you’ve set for yourself in the past. Your aggressive tendencies are being provoked by provocative Mars. Nobody really minds this month, so your relationships are probably in the clear. But for God’s sake, keep it in your pants, and keep it out of business. Your senses are sharp right now, and you can find help from those in higher positions if you play nice. Put your stinger down.

Sagittarius/Sagittarius Rising

Looking for an escape again, are we? The thing is, Sagittarius is always searching for something, but during this transit, problems of the past are beginning to illuminate. Archers are aiming their arrows somewhere. probably far far away from their current position in life; whether it be metaphorically or physically. Don’t skip the details, Sagittarius. You’re making progress to fulfill your own happiness, but do so with care for others. You’re likely to be irritable and take more unnecessary risks now. Your job is probably where you’ll find solace.

Capricorn/Capricorn Rising

Father Capricorn’s stabilizing influence is going to come in handy right now. Everyone around seems to be crazy and impractical except you, of course. Unfortunately, these mixed up signals are only going to continue for the next couple of weeks. You have to let your hair down a little, Capricorn. There are plenty people surrounding you that need to see you let loose. It makes them feel less crazy, and makes you feel less boring and uptight. We both know you’ll keep your wits about you, so take advantage of your social boost, you silly old goat.

Aquarius/Aquarius Rising

We get it, Aquarius, you’re unusual and spontaneous. But you water-bearers have vivid imaginations that carry you away sometimes. This month, focus on these two words: money and sex. You bottle up your emotions and carry them with you, figuring in your own mind that you have feelings but exercise control over how and when you feel. But your unsuspecting partner may not have this luxury, so watch what you say, and to whom. Pillow talk to you may take a more serious tone to another. Watch which avenues you use this month for your adventurous spirit. Debts you make now are going to screw you down the road.

Pisces/Pisces Rising

Any receiver of your watery affections right now are lucky indeed. But nothing is as simple as it seems.You, more than any other sign, are susceptible to the escapist way of handling aggression. Being the sensitive sign that you are, you prefer not to confront harsh reality; at least, not directly. Whatever it is that you are repressing now will certainly come out later. Creative outlets are key. I’d tell you more, but the rest of the zodiac likes you this way. For now, just enjoy the high while it lasts, and be sure you are laying groundwork for harder times later.


Viewing all articles
Browse latest Browse all 2642

Trending Articles